Ya think?

I am in a funky mood today..So, instead of writing a semi-coherent blog, I am going to just write random thoughts....

I hate money

I really hope the twins can get their roster together before opening day

Why do the vikings stay in MN if they can't even sell out multiple home games during a very short season?

I wish I could find someone to go out to lunch with today

I am nervous about 12/1/07...it's the start of my december diet....

I wonder what the outcome of the next presidential election is giong to be

I really love where I work

Because I hate cold weather...I wonder if I'll ever muster up enough courage to move south

I hate money

I really hope I can get through school

I hope the jobs my parentals have been interviewing for are a sure thing for them!!

I wish I lived in a house...so I could give little-man a puppy for christmas

The only thing getting me through this cold weather is 24/7 Christmas music! Hooray!

I wonder if little-man is going to verbally assalt me when I pick him up tonight...or if he'll be sweet like an angel

I'm still waiting on someone to set me up with a good guy

I don't even know if I could honestly handle going on a date...I'm too much of a ditz for anyone to tolerate me for more than five mintues

I wonder how many people read this...I have a feeling it is only a few good friends...which is quite alright with me :)

I am excited for softball next season! (Yes, that's wierd because softball is a loooong way away...but the team has a large spot in my heart)

M wants me to get little-man's pictures taken with his cousin...I am extremely apprehensive and stressed about dealing with Crazy-Baby-Mama!

When will the little-devil phase of little-man pass?

I wonder how annoying I am after a few drinks

Fa-la-la-la-laaaa-la-la-la-laaaaa!

Good Question..

Channel 4 does a segment called Good Question. I have submitted a couple of questions like: Why do single parents get the financial shaft from the government? and Why do you get songs stuck in your head? Neither of which have been answered. Does that mean that I don't know how to ask good questions? Yes, this post is short, and lame! Lo ciento!

Burr!

My favorite season is fall. The leaves, the crisp, but tolerable days...the fall is fantastic!
The only good thing about winter in minnesota is knowing that the holidays are JUST around the corner. I highly dislike cold weather! I don't really know why I have stayed in Minnesota, because the winters are pointless to suffer through. With winter basically arriving in MN (it was in the single digits yesterday morning...gross) I start thinking about what the next six months are going to bring to my life. They are going to bring a giant headache. This headache will come in the form of scraping my car off in the morning, waking up a half hour early to adjust to a nasty commute, little-man having cabin fever, and myself fighting the urge to flee to the south! I know I am making an ordeal out of something that every Minnesotan deals with every year...but this Minnesotan is truly sick of it!

P.S. I put little-mans' snow suit from last year on him the other day...just to see if it still fit because it was originally bought very big. He totally looks like the kid from A Christmas Story...Needless to say, I laughed pretty hard!

Good Times

What a couple of days I have had....
I did venture out on Black Friday. It was the best Black Friday experience I could have hoped for. If anyone is ever contemplating going out on Black Friday, here is what I would recommend; Go out at 9:30-9:45am....the crazy "gotta get their at 5 am" people have gone home, and the stores have re-stocked their shelves of most of the hot sales items (that obviously don't include the electronics...but I wasn't shopping for electronics, so it was perfect for me!). The parking lot was a beauty...three empty spots, right in the front, as if it was a meant to be shopping trip. The isles were clear of people, and their were red target shirts everywhere (so it was easy to ask for help finding every sale item I was hunting for!). I know there were probably stores where I could have saved and extra dollar or two...but target has won my heart, especially when it comes to the day after thanksgiving!
Tonight I went to my friend's concert. My friend didn't actually sing, but he played guitar like a PRO! I was extremely impressed!! The music was similar to Dave Mathew's Band and Jason Mraz....very fun to listen to. I even shed a few tears when one of the songs was dedicated to a good friends' dad who had passes away about a year ago....I guess the tune just hit my heart (but that's no surprise because I am a fairly emotional person). When I saw this show tonight, it made me wonder if I could ever write songs that were sang tonight...or if I could ever bring myself to preform those songs in front of a lot of people...sorry, that was random! I really had a great time tonight....really!
After the concert, we went to a bar that we don't normally frequent. They had some pretty decent drink specials, but we ended up across the street at our favorite bar in that area. I will admit, walking into the second bar (my second home in the summers...yes, that sounds bad...but it's not what you think!) made me feel like I was in an episode of Cheers...it felt like a pseudo second home! Tonight I was able to meet (and take some shots with) some new people after the concert...I will most certainly say; the concert and the after-party were good times!
As I was sitting with my friends, my mind was racing (as it normally does). I started thinking about kicking myself in the ass to get up and go talk with random guys in the bar as a sad attempt to socialize...when I got to really thinking. You see, the people I hang out with are sooooo amazing that I really don't feel the need to put myself "out there". The group of people
I was with tonight were truly stand-up, grounded. morally amazing people...why would anyone want to break themselves away from a group like just to go talk with some random person who may or may not be the biggest creep ever? Maybe that is shallow to most people, but right now it sounds extremely intelligent to me (maybe it's the many shots talking...and if its not and I still sound stupid, then the alcohol is preventing me from truly expressing what I am thinking...although, I hope my point is coming across accurately). Any who...I feel like I am rambling now (which I am)...so I'm going to hit the hay! Toodles!

P.S. It was my friend Mark's birthday today...Happy Birthday Mark...wish you would've been up to coming out tonight...hope you had a great night!!!

Black Friday

I think I have already written about this...but I feel the need to reiterate myself. I love the holidays. I have most of my holiday shopping done, but have been trying to decide if I want to venture out on Black Friday to see if there are any good deals I can find. I am afraid to venture out for a couple of reasons. First, I have heard viscious rumors that people are horrible in the stores and the parking lot. Going as far as getting physical with complete strangers over a hot item that has run out of stock. I think if I witnessed this behavior first hand, my holiday joy would instantly disappear. Second, I haven't figured out where little-man would hang out, because there is no way I would bring him into the chaos known as Black Friday! Third, I cannot decide what stores to venture out to. Walmart is at the top of my unethical list of places to avoid, but they do have crazy holiday deals (which I should take advantage of seeing as I'm broke as a joke). Target would be a must visit, but I know I'll end up buying way too much...And then there is Best Buy, Old Navy and Kohl's. The more I think about it, the more I am leaning towards avoiding retail stores all together on Friday...only time will tell! Toodles!

Tragic Spinster

I am Bridget Jones. I actually have a t-shirt that says so. I got the shirt from my mom when I was in high school (before I had seen the movie)...talk about self fulfilling prophecy eh? In truth, I am mostly like Bridget Jones...except for the smoking and the fact that I have little-man....pretty much everything else is me to a tee. I never seem to attract the right guys...I am a mumbling idiot when it comes to important social situations (I get verbal diarrhea and can't stop myself...I also try to pretend like I actually know what I'm talking about, when I really know nothing!!)
Like Bridget, I have good intentions in life. I don't feel it is too much to believe I will meet a good guy, and feel on top of the world. I guess what makes me feel the most like Bridget, is waiting for my Mark Darcy to come along and "like me, just as I am." I hold onto hope that finding someone who will like me for me is a possibility...not just something you see in the movies. If you haven't seen the movie I would recommend it on a rainy day. It always manages to bring a smile to my face, and some hope to my heart.

Last Weekend...

I will start off by saying "Good morning, good morning and to all of you a pleasant good morning" (Favorite quote from Ann Curry often replayed on The Soup). This past weekend was a bit different. Friday, little-man and I spent the evening at a Thanksgiving Potluck at his daycare. The food was actually pretty decent, and the people weren't too shabby. You always get the "weird people" when you have large get-togethers', but thankfully, they were not sitting at my table. The daycare actually cooked the majority of the food on site, including the turkey and a bunch of stuffing. They actually allowed people to bring in pre-cooked food (which I am always a little leery about...but obviously I survived). Little-man behaved like any toddler would, but lucky for me there were all of his little toddler friends to run around with, so my stress levels stayed fairly low. The potluck lasted until a little after 8, so when we got home, little-man went straight to bed...and I got to have some much needed chill time vegging out watching some tv (nothing good was on, just brainless channel surfing). Saturday was spent laying low in the morning. In the afternoon, D came over and we drove down to Northfield for a wedding. It was my second cousins' wedding...needless to say, I just went to be polite, but I really have nothing to do with him (his parents are super nice though, so it was nice to see them). To be honest, the groom probably didn't even know my name, but was forced to invite me and my dad out of respect (which, before attending the wedding I hadn't minded because I figured I could get a free meal out of the deal..shallow? yes!). So, D and I show up the usual ten minutes late..sit in the back of the church and start listening to the ceremony. Little-man was actually an angel during the ceremony, but I attribute that to the fact that we were in a new environment with a lot of people around...the second he was comfortable he converted back to the crazy little monster I know and love! The reception was in the actual church. Our table was right next to the buffet. The food consisted of an interpretation of a southern pig roast (apparently, the bride was from Texas). They had a whole smoked hog (head and all) laying at the end of the table, with spicy gross baked beans, out-of-a-box augratin potatoes, cole slaw, and a veggie tray...Even though it was free, it was probably the worst food I have ever had at a wedding. I feel bad for being so judgemental, but working in the banquet business for a while, I have come to expect a wedding to be treated as a formal event, with real plates, real silverware, and actual glass cups for beverages. There was not a bar, or even a dance to follow. The musical entertainment took place during dinner. There were two different "groups" that took turn playing. The first was a guy who looked like he could be a serial killer. He walked around wearing a red button down shirt (tucked tightly into his black jeans with a huge silver belt buckle) and cowboy boots. He had hair past his shoulders and refused to take his sun glasses off the whole night. The second was a three piece group consisting of a guy playing the banjo, a girl scraping a laundry washboard and a third guy using a violin bow to play the side of a saw (yes, you read right, an actual hand-saw...weird!) I guess this is an instance where the saying "to each their own" comes into play.
Sunday was another chill day for me. I was able to watch the vikings look somewhat decent despite missing our star running back. In all, I really didn't accomplish a whole lot this past weekend, besides meeting a couple of families from little-man's daycare, and attending a really po-dunk wedding. Toodles

Cutting the Cord!

A friend of mine recently posed the question "Who are your top five celebrity crushes" which got me thinking....
I think I have turned asexual since having little-man! At the same time, I am a total hypocrite! All I ever say is "I want to go out on a date...I need to meet someone...Please people, set me up!"....But when it came to thinking about what celebrities I had a crush on, none immediately came to mind! I tried taking a step back from my life to take a look at what was going on, and discovered I invest %100 of me to little-man (which I feel is important, and a good thing...don't get me wrong) The balance of being a working single mom, and a mom to a toddler definitely leaves me with a full plate...but I KNOW I am ready to add a dating life to the mix...I just need to figure out a way to cut my mommy umbilical chord! Any suggestions?!?!

Doctor Debt

I recently started a new job, which means getting used to a new insurance plan. The plan my current job offers is an HSA (Health Savings Account) plan which entails a low premium but a high deductible. The insurance is so different for everyone in the office that my company has had numerous educational sessions this year to try and re-explain the so-called "benefits" of having an HSA plan. If you are unfamiliar with this plan (which a lot of people are, seeing as an HMO is still very common in MN) it basically means my company deposits a certain dollar amount into an HSA account in my name, and I am responsible for paying for doctors visits that are not considered "preventative care" (e.g a physical is preventative care, so it is covered by the insurance company %100...or so they say...). There are a few reasons why this plan really sucks for me...
First, there is a glitch in the good ol' state-o-minnesota....MN has a state law prohibiting medical providers from disclosing their rates. Why does this suck for someone in my position? Well, if I want to pick a primary care physician, I would want to price compare, seeing as I will be paying for the visit out of my own pocket. This plan does not run on co-pays at ALL. It is completely out of pocket until you reach the high deductible of $2,200.oo per year (after that amount is reached, you are then covered at %100).
Someone in my shoes (with myself and little-man to look out for) is also initially monetarily screwed with the HSA plan. We are screwed because little-man constantly needs to go to the doctor for ear infections and other random stuff he gets from being in daycare. I don't know about you..but for someone in my shoes, it is RARE that I will have $2,200.00 sitting around for medical expenses throughout my year....let's be real, I can't even afford to pay my monthly minimum bills, let alone added medical bills from when little-man needs to get his poor ears checked out!
In the past two months, little-man has had to be rushed to urgent care on two separate occasions (I think I already blogged about one of the two...). My entire life I have been on an HMO..I had my good and bad days dealing with them, but for the most part, I knew exactly what to expect!
I'm not looking for a pity party...I'm just writing this to vent! Who in their right mind invented a health plan like this one ?! I know the HSA eases the expense of the company I am working for...but it really hurts the employee pocket-book, especially for those with small feet in their life, or with small feet on the way! (another co-worker of mine has an expecting wife...and they're going to have to pay for the ultrasound and every lab test out of pocket because the insurance company does not constitute those things as preventative care...weird huh?)
I feel like I have just been bent over and asked to grab my ankles (sorry for the gross description...but seriously!)...not by my company (who I should probably be more frustrated with)..but by the stupid person who invented this insurance plan...it sucks more than a vacuum!
I will step off of my soapbox now...Hope everyone is having a happy Friday!!! Tootles!

Oh My!

This morning, life has slapped me with a twist that I am not prepared for. As I was getting ready for work, I noticed something glistening back at me in the mirror. I took a closer look, and to my dismay, found my worst nightmare...a silvery grey hair. I might start crying while writing this..."Going Grey" is something I have figured wouldn't happen to me...even though my dad was completely grey by age 20, and my mom was completely grey by age 30. I know I sound completely in denial about my hair turning grey because of my parents' premature hair change...but this is just something I am not ready for! Grey hair is not something I want to welcome into my life BEFORE I turn 25.

What did I do with this grey hair? I closed my eyes, shook my head, and then continued on with my morning. I have heard if you pluck the grey, it will start multiplying, and like HELL I want that to happen...so for now I am going to pretend like I didn't see it, in hopes of it disappearing on its own (fat chance huh!?)

Yes, I know I am being a baby about this...but again, I am ONLY 24! My hair has been the one good solid thing going for me! If I was married, or in a long-term relationship, I would have a good shoulder to cry on (and possibly someone pointing and laughing at me) but I haven't found that special someone yet, and the thought of starting to date again with a head full of grey monsters sounds a bit daunting.

To be quite honest, I wasn't even going to blog about this today...I was going to continue to be in denial. When I went to blog, I decided it was going to be better to just get it out in the open...

Bumper Sticker Mayhem

Driving to work this morning, I noticed a bumper stick of the car next to me. It read "I think, therefore I'm Liberal" (note, this car also had three other political-type bumper stickers on their car, this was the only one that stuck out to me). I know politics can be a controversial subject, but the bumper sticker made me ponder its meaning.
To be honest, this bumper sticker slightly disturbed me. I consider myself to be liberal. I will admit, I love to hear the entire story before forming an opinion, and saying yay or nay. I know many people who are conservative as well. Am I wrong in interpreting this bumper sticker as an extremely close minded statement "conservatives don't think." Call me crazy, but I know many conservative people who put a lot of thought into their decisions and opinions on matters in life. I think what I am getting at is maybe if EVERYONE stopped focusing on being liberal or conservative, and focused on the issues at hand, and how to resolve "said issues" to the benefit of all, we would be a happier country and maybe even a happier, healthier, safer world. Maybe that's a huge stretch, but maybe it isn't...

Tis the Season!

I cannot believe thanksgiving is less than ten days away! This year seems to have flown by!! I am such a sucker for the holiday season. The family get togethers, large meals, and all-around good times the holiday's bring are in a league of their own. It makes me wonder...what makes the holiday's so special?
When I think back to christmas' of the past, I can't help but smile. I have been extremely blessed with my family and friends I have had to share the holiday season with. In my family, the holidays never failed to bring warmth , smiles, laughter, and everything one would hope for to short cold winter days.
Growing up, I was as spoiled as a child with a little brother could be. I know money does not buy everything, but my brother and I never went without a good amount of presents from Santa...Aside from D claiming to be sick most holidays, I love looking back and realizing how my parents made an extra effort on christmas to be a family. It was the one day of the year when we would wake up together, we would sit together and share gifts, and we would eat breakfast together. My family has always been very busy with varying schedules (sports, different work schedules etc) and my parents did their best to juggle my schedule with my brothers. With such busy schedules we almost never were able to sit down for family meals, and there was hardly a time where the entire family was home at the same time. Maybe if my family made more of an effort to do family activities then the holiday's would lose some of its magic.
Looking towards the future, I hope to continue to make the holidays special and magical for myself and little-man. Last year it dawned on me that I have a family and I have to start doing family things, even though I am without a husband or active father figure in little-man's life. I decided to start a new holiday tradition for myself and little-man; attending the holidazzle parade. I never went to the holidazzle growing up because my parents considered it to be on the wrong side of the river (they both grew up in st. paul, and RARELY went to minneapolis). I would occasionally catch the parade on tv, and always thought it would be fantastic to see it in person. I was certainly right. I am tearing up thinking of how beautiful the parade, and the idea's behind the parade are. If you are unfamiliar with the holidazzle, it is a parade that goes down nicollet mall in minneapolis, and runs on weekend nights from the day after thanksgiving until just before christmas..the lights are so much fun to look at, there is holiday music playing, tons of people out and about as families and the parade collects food and monetary donations for local charities. I cannot think of a better way to spend a holiday evening than with your family, donating some food to charity and watching a really cool lit-up parade. Little-man enjoyed the parade last year. I hope he continues to enjoy it for years to come!!
I feel like I've rambled on a tangent...which I normally do! More to come later...Toodles :)

News?

I was settling into my daily night ritual of watching television after little-man was fast asleep when I decided to flip to the 10pm news. I try and discipline myself to be in bed by ten (sad, yes...but I have to be up at 6am, and I am a creature who desperately needs her beauty sleep!) so I rarely watch the news at 10...
I would say that I posess a gut instinct when it comes to right and wrong. I know I am not always right, but my gut doesn't to lie to me. My gut is telling me there is something missing in our local news coverage. I am not attempting to delve too deep with this insight (no worries of conspiracy theory here!) But all I am saying is there has to be something missing from news coverage if a person feels more inclined to watch a re-run on MTV than sit and listen to what is supposedly going on in the surrounding area. Maybe I am the one that needs the "Reality Check"...but maybe I'm not.
I understand the quality of the content varies from each channel you watch, but I will say for certainty that I am not impressed by what certain new affiliates have to offer (specifically one channel, which I will not name). How can these stations stay in business with some of the garbage that is covered? I think there is a more daunting fact that should be addressed. There are actually people who spend a half our of their time buying into the garbage broadcasts....I admit, I buy into reality television. But I do not think reality television is actually real! Unfortunately, people who watch these garbage news broadcasts actually believe what they are seeing...that's kind of scary if you ask me...

I want a glass of milk too!

There is a saying "If you give a mouse a cookie, he'll ask for a glass of milk." I feel like I am the mouse, and all I want is a glass of milk.

Many people are not as fortunate as me to have a family who is willing to do just about anything for you. Without notice, my family seems to change at the drop of a pin. Most people know my parents got divorced my senior year of high school (and if you don't know, it was pretty ugly...M was caught kissing another guy in our own home...M now lives with this guy, it has been about six years now...) I love my immediate family. My parent's are extremely supportive. My bro, who I'll call Navy, has cleaned up his life. Even though my parents are very helpful with little-man, I feel very alone in my quest for support.

M has been without a job for almost a year, and has not been actively looking. She feels she has paid her dues, and does not want to start a new job at the bottom of the totem poll. I understand where M is coming from, but at the same time I don't. All M seems to be doing is sleeping-in, meeting friends for lunch, doing random chores around her house, and going out of town (mostly to uncle T's house) on the weekends. If I want a night to myself to hang out with my friends I feel as if I am imposing on her busy life. All I want is for M to willingly take little-man once a week so I can have some mommy time...I had not felt selfish for thinking this until I actually wrote it down and was able to see my thoughts instead of just thinking them. I keep telling myself I have it great compared to some people who don't have a husband AND don't have a single supportive person in their life...but great just isn't cutting it for me right now!

D was forced into retirement because the lovely truck manufacturing company he worked at was not on top of its game and had to shut down. If it were up to D, he would have stayed working full-time for at least five more years. Since leaving his job (which is also going on a year now) he has done a lot of golfing, taken a few trips, met his guy friends for the occasional lunch or dinner and completed bartending school. He has also been online dating (which is a whole different post soon to come...). D really loves little-man, but I always feel a twinge of guilt when I ask him to give me "mommy time" so I can go out. Is it really too much to ask for ONE night a week to have to myself. Most married people even get one night away from the kids (Honey, watch the kids, I have to go to the store...it's as simple as that...no sitter, hardly any hassle)

Navy is stationed in Crete Greece (lucky bastard!) Navy has had it made since joining the military. He lives on a beautiful island paradise. His only downfalls are being away from his little girl, Bop (which I cannot even begin to imagine how difficult that must be on him), having to deal with "baby-mama drama" from thousands of miles away, and falling in love with a girl from sweden who is too young to appreciate what love is. Navy and I were never really close growing up. We were the brother and sister who were always fighting. When things got really tough we were always there for each other. I attribute us not currently being close to poor timing. When M was caught in the act, she was caught by Navy. The year to follow was a horrible mess. I know I could have handled myself better, but when you're 18 and a senior in high school, you think you know everything and you only think about yourself. My freshman year of college I went to Duluth for school, and Navy found drugs. Needless to say, Navy was entangled in a nasty mess of god only knows what drugs for the next four years, leading up to the birth of his daughter, (which thankfully sobered him up for good). Just before Bop's second birthday, Navy joined the military, and is due to check out in about four years. I am so proud of him for cleaning up his life, but it leaves me one more body short of a gauranteed "mommy's night out" seeing as the commute from greece to home is a little too pricy to take just to babysit :p

I want to take a moment to define what I mean by mommy time. Mommy time is anytime where I don't have little-man with or around me. It is a time where you don't have to focus if you don't want to. Work is not mommy time because you have to work...driving to get little-man is a taste of mommy time only because I can talk on the phone without a screaming whiny baby in the background, (but fighting traffic to get to little-man is not the most enjoyable thing in the world, so I don't count it!). For me, it is extremely liberating to run an errand like going to target or grocery shopping without little-man. Occasionally seeing the girls without worrying about little-man would also be nice...

I may be viewed as selfish or crazy or whatever...all I can say for certain is I want my cookie, and give me a glass of milk!

Evil Addiction

I think there should be support groups for people who watch too much television. As they say in AA, the first step to recovery is admitting you have a problem. I am addicted to television. I am addicted to all types of television shows ranging from romantic dramatic comedies to reality smut. It is quite an embarrassing thing to admit.
In part, I blame my addiction on becoming a mother. Since little-man was born I have been trapped in my house in the evening to establish a night-time routine with him, and I feel my only way to feel in control of my evening is to pick up the remote and start flipping! Thank god I am not dating anyone because I know they would find my channel surfing to be down right repulsive (not to mention my program choices are pretty horrid too). In my heart, I know I have always been a television addict, and I am just using motherhood as an excuse to make me feel better about my horrible habbit. I wish I knew a good way to break my addiction for the horrible programs I watch, and limit my intake to three television shows a week...I just can't do it! I want to spend my time being productive; like keeping up with laundry and making my house extremely clean...but I hate cleaning and laundry just takes time away from tv watching...so the cleaning and the laundry are constantly being put off. I wish I focus my energy on other things from 8-10pm...
For now...I continue to watch tv...but at least I have admitted my problem....and I have confidence that when the time comes, I will take the batteries out of the remote and start cleaning up my life!

Me

While going to sleep last night, I started thinking about what I could write about. I came up with a rather generic idea of writing down my likes, dislikes and loves. Keep in mind, the lists are in no particular order, and they are random and odd....so here it goes:

I dislike:
raisins, people who don't know how to drive, ignorance, cleaning, spiders, cockroaches, centipedes, trying to get in shape, mean people, money, credit cards, smoking, the packers, having to back 14 dozen cookies for the holiday cookie exhange, getting hit with a ball when I am pitching, trying to remember to water my houseplants, when people use my personal computer, trying to communicate with my brother while he's stationed in Greece, George W. Bush, myspace, iphone commercials, most generic commercials, not having tivo/dvr, liquid cough syrup, doing straight shots of any kind of liquor, running

I like:
curling up on the couch to watch a good movie, being a mom-person, reality television, singing a song even if I don't know all of the words, cool overcast fall days, going on bike rides, beer, when the vikings win, when people answer thier phone when I call them, clicky blue pens, reading blogs of people I know, facebook, snacking on junk food, soda pop, bubble gum, talking to people, feeling accomplished, talking about sports (even though I pretend to know what I am talking about, when I really haven't a clue...),

I love:
Little-man, ice cream, music, having good people in my life, my family, being an aunt, my job, being independant, helping people, nice people, my softball team, cooking, flowers, walking on the state trails, camping, going to a baseball game, When Harry Met Sally, afternoon naps, homemade chocolate chip cookies, christmas, thanksgiving, eating, reading a good book while laying on a tropical beach, cinnamon candles, the smell of a freshly cleaned house, chocolate covered strawberries, crab, a good steak, my dads' salads, going to see the Wild, watching sports, waking up without an alarm clock, family traditions,

I am going to attempt to add to this list throughout the day as more things come to mind, but I feel I have gotten a pretty good start! Toodles!

I'm still a person...or am I?

In the past few months I have been struggling with a slight identity crisis. Since becoming the mother of a beautiful little-man, I have found it has put my friends into tricky social situations. My friends are truely great people, I couldn't ask to be surrounded with a more grounded, supportive group of people. Being one of the first of the group to have a baby, I have noticed the slightest bit of hesitation when it comes to inviting me to social events (and not to sound snotty, but I am attributing this to the fact that I am with child, not because people secretly hate me :p ). I have given the "I want to be known as a person, and not just a mom" speech to a few friends who were truthful with me about their struggle pertaining to my current life status. I never understood why it was so difficult for people to see me as me, and not just as a mom....until I read my first post...
Looking at what I wrote yesterday makes me realize how much my little-man has become who I am. Yes, I am still a person...but I'm a mom-person now. I can hardly hold a conversation without bringing little-man up in some way shape or form. I don't want to be one of those people who always brings up their little ones, but boy is it hard not to! I truely love my little-man, and after some thought, have decided it is okay for the people around me to view me as a mom. I guess I just hope that I can be a mom who LOVES to be included in social functions (no matter how big or small), and a mom who isn't afraid to have a good time....If I can manage to get myself in shape I might even be comfortable being called a MILF ;)

There's A First Time For Everything

I enjoy reading the my friends blogs, so I have decided to create my own in hopes of returning the laughs I have received from others. So in lieu of sounding cheesy, this is the first time I have officially blogged...
On that note...last weekend was quite a doozie! I will start with Friday (if you have a weak stomach this will not be a good read!)
Little-man woke me up at 2am Friday morning throwing-up. I wish I had a better way of writing that, and I won't elaborate too much...but it was nasty. Shortly after I got him into my bed, I went to his room to clean up the mess, and ended up running to the bathroom myself...it was gross! When we woke up on Friday morning, I went to change his diaper only to find out that little-man had developed a HORRIBLE diaper rash that just so happened to be bleeding. I know I am still a new parent, but I have taken care of many children in my past. I will say, this is the first time in my life I have ever seen a bleeding diaper rash. Being the "First time mom who thought she had seen everything" I immediately called the doctor who told me to bring little-man into urgent care. I got the two of us to the doctor first thing. Thirty seconds before the doctor came to see us, little-man had another blow-out in his diaper! Fear raced through me because I knew he had to be changed, and I also knew how horrible it was going to feel for me to change him. When the doctor came in, I informed her of his messy pants and explained the situation (little-man had also informed her of his messy pants because BOY did it STINK!) We tag-teamed little-man to try and get him cleaned up. I started balling...This was the first time since he was three weeks old that I felt overwhelmed with guilt because of him being in pain (the first time I was overwhelmed with guilt was during his first shots). For some reason, I felt like I was failing him as a mother. What mother would let something like this horrible diaper rash happen to their child (yes, my logic was a bit crazy...but that's just me!). I know now that I had nothing to do with this rash, but at the time I felt as if the doctor needed to call child services because I obviously did not know how to take care of my baby...Forty dollars and one tub of "poop goop" later we were clear of the doctor. The rest of the day little-man was super cuddly...he took three separate naps, two of which were with me, which he hasn't done since he was six months old!
Saturday began with breakfast. I was very cautious to feed little-man because he was still having weird diapers, and I didn't want to provoke his tummy if it was still upset; So waffles in the toaster it was! He loved every bite, but shortly after breakfast he became super cuddly again...(in my head I was thinking "Oh Shit, here we go again"). At about 10am little man laid down in the middle of the living room and went to sleep. Again, for those of you that know little man, it was completely out of character for him! We made it through the rest of the day, and by the evening it was time for me to go out (mommy needed a break from the sickness!!) I dressed up as Dog the Bounty Hunters wife Beth. Dog's horrible comments earlier in the week had totally slipped my mind when I borrowed the costume from a co-worker, but it definitely sparked some interesting convo's throughout the night. Most people knew who I was, but some thought I was Anna Nicole Smith...I didn't know if I should be offended or flattered...hahaha
The costume party I went to was so much fun, and everyone there was extremely creative with their costumes...being with good friends and great people was definitely the highlight of my weekend.
Sunday brought a whole new world of pain. I really didn't think I had too much to drink on Saturday night, but on Sunday I woke up hugging the toilet. Either I am getting too old to party, or I got little-mans' bug (I think it's a slight combination of both). All day Sunday I was completely out of it. Little-man was still a bit out-of-sorts, but even in my sickness I could tell he was beginning to get back to normal. On top of everything, it was daylight savings time. Normally I would be happy about "Fall Back"...but on Sunday, I was loathing it. Daylight Savings made the time feel like it had come to a halt, with my aching and exhausted body wishing for the day to end!! By the evening I was so happy to finally put little man to bed (I was in bed soon after)
So, in a nutshell, this past weekend I dealt with my first bloody diaper rash, my first great Halloween party, and now my first blog. Toodles!