Some days are great, others are not...but no matter what twists and turns I encounter, you can be sure I'm going to write about it!

Tuesday, June 9, 2009

I wonder.

Most days my mind never stops spinning.

I sit.

I wonder.

Most days, while mind-spinning is occurring, I think about quirky attributes of mine…and it’s always followed up with a “….and I wonder why I’m single.”
I say it with the highest amount of sarcasm imaginable...mainly because I know why I’m single.

• I know what I want and I’m not afraid to say so. This intimidates most males.
• I’m a single mom. While most of you MIGHT think “SO WHAT?!” I’ve heard quite the contrary. I’ve heard that guys fear my breed. They worry that single mom’s will expect more commitment. They cringe at the thought of kids in general, let alone a woman WITH A CHILD THAT ISN’T HIS, GASP!! Oh, and us single mom’s? We have scales.
• On that note, my sarcasm is a bit much for most men to handle. I get it from my father.
• I’m spontaneously on a schedule. Does this make sense? Didn’t think so. What I mean, is I LOVE grasping onto the concept of sponaity. Pre-child, I was one of the most spontaneous people I knew. Wanna drive 8hours to Canada? YES! Wanna jump in puddles? SCORE! Post-child, I need to maintain a mundane schedule of work m-f followed by dinner and bed…and on weekends , I have to adhere to breakfast, lunch, nap-time, dinner and an early bedtime…sound exciting to you? Yeah, me neither…but it’s what I have to do…SO…In order to hold on to that pre-baby spontaneous side…I love to do fun simple things on a whim.
• My self confidence is lacking…but whose isn’t? Even if you proclaim to be the most confident person in the world….you’ve got insecurities. I think mine just show more than others.
• I’m blunt. I’m not afraid to call people on things I disagree with. I know this is an off-putting trait…again, I get it from my father.

I’m currently comfortable with my single-mom-slightly mundane lifestyle. I love experiencing life through the eyes of my little man. I love knowing that I’m raising a boy to be a man (and a darn-tooting respectable one if I have ANYTHING to say about it).

Maybe I’ll wake up next to the man of my dreams one day. If and when it happens, I’m sure I’ll be constantly pinching myself in a swooping attempt to wake myself up. If a man exists that can put up with my silly characteristic traits…he must be a saint.

1 comment:

  1. but see, you'll put up with his, so all is fair. This reminds me of this morning, I said to My Guy "Oh, you think all my little neuroses and anxieties are cute now...but just wait a few months!"

    And if that's the worst about you, you'll find him some day. Don't loose faith, but stay happy with what you got.