The Simple Things in Life

Weekends spent with myself (and myself only) are as rare as a 90 degree day in January…in Minnesota.

This weekend spontaneously turned into one of those rare treats. It was a bit ironic that the week that both little man and I were sick was concluded by a weekend spent healthy and solo. Time spent away from each other is chicken soup for both of our souls.

What does a single late-twenty-something do with “free time”?

Hell if I know!

I started by meeting some friends for a pontoon ride on a local lake. Pure bliss. The sun beating down on the water, good company, and cold beverages were medicine for my soul. Sure, I had EVERY INTENTION of being productive at home….but to be able to get up and go, without making sure others have used the bathroom, have Blanket, or are in need of a nap, I digress.

I couldn’t resist traipsing around town, checking out a clothing store that is hell to bring a toddler to. Finding some AMAZING deals. Spontaneously spending my free Saturday night with a great friend from High School whom I don’t get to see often enough. Laughing. Having a few (more) adult beverages. Dancing to live music. Sleeping, uninterrupted.

My weekend was filled with a million simple things most single child-free people take for granted. It was blissful. It was calm. It was perfect….However, my heart prevailed and I was damn happy when life returned to me and little man. We might not live life to the beat of a single person’s drum, but I honestly do love the beat we live by.

It's been a while.

I have been extremely out of touch with this little corner of the internet...and I have zero excuses...well...except for the fact that life has been getting in my way.

Work life.
Family.
Friends.
Traveling (nothing huge, just a camping trip here and a trip to the cabin there....OH! I can tell you about CAMPING...exciting, right? Yeah yeah yeah...just bare with me!)

So...I got a little bug up my rear and decided I was going to take little man camping. Sure, I'm a girl who loves to wear a dress, but I am never afraid to get dirty. I had all of the supplies I'd ever need:

Tent
Air Mattresses
Car adapted pump for said air mattresses
flash light
swiss army knife
cooler
wicked awesome campfire starting skills
sleeping bags
bug spray
sunscreen

You get the point.

Because this was such a spontaneous idea, I planned on going to a State Park, but wasn't able to make a reservation...I was winging it.

OF COURSE that weekend, well, the particular friday we were set to leave, HUGE tornado producing storms were destined for my state park of choice. I was pretty bummed out until a little light bulb went off in my head that, duh, there are over 100 state parks...I could just head the opposite direction of huge said storm. Go me.

So, instead of heading north, I headed south. A very small voice inside of me shouted "southern MN has been TORNADO ALLEY THIS YEAR...SERIOUSLY" but doggone it, I was taking my little man camping if it was the last thing I did.

As we headed out of town, it was raining so hard you could barely see 10 feet in front of your vehicle. Little man thought it was awesome....all I could think was that I hoped it would stop raining by the time we got to the park (unbeknown to me, the highway we had been driving on flooded a mere 15 minutes after we had left town, I digress).

Friday night we really lucked out (weather wise). As it turned out, two huge cells were north and south of us...but we managed to set up shop in an area that avoided the danger.

Saturday morning came. Breakfast was had. We hiked to a small waterfall. Little man played on their small playground for a bit. We settled down for an early afternoon nap....and was woken up by the park ranger telling us we were under a tornado watch until 10pm that night.

Awesome.

In a nutshell, a call from my father at 7pm to warn me of a nasty storm headed in my direction was enough for me to pack up the site within 40 minutes and head home. We were only an hour out of the cities...I didn't want to press my luck two nights in a row. Life is too short to be taken out by a giant oak tree because I HAD TO GO CAMPING.

All in all, camping was a success. There are things I would do the same the next go-around...and things I would improve on. With the state parks sticker on my front window, I'm confident there will be at least one more trip in our near future.

Single Parenthood.

I feel like this is a bold, bold statement...but sometimes I think I make single parenting look damn good.

Let me be the first to tell you that being a single parent has presented me with an intense list of con's that have weighed heavy on my heart. Here's a pro, and a con;

Pro:
I do (and deal with) everything alone - the only resistance I'm met with is my own subconscious (and that of a 3.5 year old).

Con:
I do (and deal with) everything alone - No second opinions for this chick. No ulterior way of handling an intense situation.

Coincidence that they're pretty much the same? I think not.

I'll venture to say I'm stubborn..and I RE-FUSE to let the con's prevent little man from experiencing a well-rounded childhood.

I came to the realization that I make single parenting look easy when I was browsing some pictures I had uploaded to shut your face facebook.

I have pictures of the two of us on the field of the Metrodome, of us ice skating at the excel center, of play dates at the park...Almost every single photo I've taken of myself and little man have been taken by strangers. I tell you this only to shed some light on my situation. Is it easy to ask a stranger to take a picture of you and your son? Nope. But it's worth the (slight) embarrassment to capture our moments together. By no means is this a pity party...just a small glimpse of my reality.

I know I've written about my struggle to remain an individual apart from being a mom...and in doing that, I haven't truly disclosed what I go through as a single mom. Sure, I write about little parenting things, about how I get frustrated when little man acts up...or how I feel like I don't fit in as much with my friends who don't have children...and don't forget my struggles to make friends with other parents...Maybe the majority of my thoughts are over shared musings because I yearn for someone to share the sweet (and bitter) moments with. All things considered, I get that I'm a "mom" now. I think know that it has been a change for the better.

I believe in "damning the man". If someone doubts me, I love proving them wrong. Maybe I feel like I'm doing a good job because I know how difficult the last three and a half years have been. I know I've had choices. I could've given up at anytime, but I didn't...and ya know what? It hasn't been easy. I've shed MANY a tear. I've laughed off much frustration...however, the struggles I've been faced with (and continue to face every single day) are absolutely worth it.

Lovin My Life

I had a fantastically negative post lined up regarding my disdain for certain family dysfunctions...I slept on it, and decided (as I was about to drift off into la la land) that nobody really wants to read dramatic whining crap.

Here's a couple of reasons why I LOVE being a mom.

Unconditional love.

There's really nothing quite like it. The first time I was slapped in the face with unconditional love was when I met my niece the day she was born. She was pure and complete perfection. My brother and niece's mom were very young parents. I remember walking into the hospital room, saying "Where's my little princess?" They told me she was hungry, and I said "hand her over"....she took her mini bottle from me like the champ I knew she was. It was adorable, sweet, and a moment I will never forget.
When I became preggo with my own little one, I'll be the first to tell you how terrified I was. I knew from the get-go I would be his only parent. I had no clue how I was going to physically bring this sweet angel of mine into the world. Well, truth be told I managed to overcome my fear. As excruciatingly exhausted as I was the night morning that I delivered him, I was also overflowing with a euphoria I could never have imagined. He was here, he was mine, and he was a 9lb, 2oz baby bundle of amazingness.
It's weird to think back to the first time we faced each other, because he was EXACTLY like I thought he would be. Even to this day, I look at him and I see my baby. I see what he'll look like at 15. I see his future. Every time I stare into his eyes, he bares his soul, and biased as I might be, it's a good soul. When he's happy, I can feel it. When he's sad, it pains my heart. He's an extension of me as much as he is his own person. I never thought I could love anyone as much as I love him.

Laughter

As a mom, there are many moments that are difficult to keep your cool. For every difficult moment, there are ten times as many moments where you find yourself laughing at the ridiculous situations life throws at you. Whether it's an accidental slip, an unexpected burp, or a silly facial expression, sharing those moments with my child have given my belly such a workout from laughing.
The silly moments are what makes the difficult moments worthwhile. Recently, little man's humor has began to develop. He tells (straight out) that he's going to do something naughty. He catches me completely off guard, and then he quickly follows up with a goofy "I'm just kiddin mom!" with hilarious hand gestures and all. It's a moment where I can see how much he enjoys laughing. It's a moment where I am so blessed that he wants to share his silliness with me. If you can't laugh at yourself, who can you laugh at?

Mom's Day

In a couple of weeks, Mother's day will be here. Yes, it's a commercial holiday...but a doggone important one! For some, it's a day where husbands buy their wife something special, let them sleep in, and even bring them breakfast in bed.

If I could ask for anything this coming Mother's day, it would be this:


There's a fat chance in (you know where) that I would ever actually receive something so beautiful. I fell in love with this piece over the holidays. The story behind the pendent involves hearts always being open. I think it's beautiful, both intellectually and aesthetically.

Instead, this is all I expect on Mom's day:


What I want and what I'm going to get are quite alright with me. While what I want costs money my little man does not have, what I am going to get from him is absolutely priceless.

**I'll be sure to post what I'm giving my Mom...It's kind of silly, but something I know she wants!**