I feel ashamed.

I said I would never do it. I don't need to add more daily internet distractions to my life....but I did.

I joined Twitter.

I almost feel like I should spend the better half of the next century repenting my tweets. I will admit, I'm pretty much a facebook addict....so why add another addiction? Yeah, I know...

I still don't get the hype around tweeting, and twitter as a whole. It took me over a day to figure out how to actually "tweet" to someone publicly. There's a lot about the website I don't understand in the least...it kinda makes me feel old and outdated...

BUT, I'm bound and determined to try and make it my own. If you're interested in following me...I am @stacemah. Stop by and say hello...at the very least, make fun of me for being a completely clueless tweeter.

Happy Memorial Day!!

...

Today, I woke up happy.

The River

Every day, on my way to and from work, I cross the Mighty Mississippi. I am enthralled at how gorgeous the shorelines are although the bridge happens to be in the middle of Minneapolis.

This morning, as I was driving to work, I was struck with a small epiphany. You see, today, the river was calm. Yesterday, when the winds were fiercely blowing, the river had white-caps. Doesn't the same hold true for life?

When nothing seems to go right, and the winds of frustration are strong, you life feels agitated.
When the winds die down, life turns peaceful and jovial, just like the river without winds.

The power a river possesses is very frightening to me. The currents are a bit unpredictable, and in most cases, unless you go with the flow you're in for an exhausting ride. I guess I'll admit that life scares me too, but I'm going to do my best to go with the flow and hope for a great outcome.

To Run

"I hate whoever invented running." Words I used to mutter continuously growing up. Whenever a coach instructed me to run, I would cringe. I would struggle, and curse in my head during the entire run. I wouldn't be happy.

A few weeks ago, I decided I was going to "run" a 5K. Now, seeing as my outlook on running in general is rather dis-tasteful, I think my inquiry for company surprised a few. I joked with others when asked if I had been training by saying "of COURSE...I've been thinking about it EVERY DAY!"

This morning marked D-Day. I felt a bit guilty because my pace was quite slow compared to that of my friends who were in much better shape than me. My goal was to finish in 45 minutes. I crossed the finish line in 45:22 (not too shabby if you ask me!).

Then, it was awards time. No, I didn't receive an award...but rather, witnessed people from many different walks of life who had participated in the run. Young kids and old adults adults alike. At that moment, I began to realize WHY people run. It's something virtually anyone can do. So long as you can walk, you can run. One foot in front of the other is the most coordination that is required. One foot in front of the other. It's simple. It takes your breath away. It hurts your legs when they aren't used to it. But it's still one foot in front of the other, old or young, fast or slow.

My legs still feel tired from the run this morning. I plan on signing up for another one. Although I'll probably struggle walking tomorrow, I plan on ACTUALLY training for the next race. I also plan on running the entire thing. I'd be lying if I told you I wasn't excited.

What to do?

I feel as if I'm at a crossroads. I have (what feels like) a million different ways I can turn, and I haven't been able to figure out which path will be the best decision.

I feel like moving. The catch? I would really love to move into a house (but for financial reasons CANNOT afford it). I also really love where I currently live. The downside to where I currently live? I feel like something is missing. Maybe if I get a garage so I can clear the outdoor toys out of my closets I'll feel a little less suffocated? Who knows!

I feel like relocating to another state. The catch? As fantastic as it sounds on paper, moving to another state where my social circle equals zero scares me to bits.

I feel like putting myself up for adoption. The catch? As frustrating as my family is, they're still my family. I CERTAINLY don't like a single one of them right now, but I will always love them. I wish my immediate family life wasn't so darn complicated. A dad who could care less if we spoke to one another. A mom who has a good heart but always seems to make crappy decisions. A brother who has a good heart but is so selfish and manipulating that he drives me UP A WALL. Do you know of any families willing to take a semi-crazy girl and her three year old son in? Thnx.

hmph.

Today I feel like I need to do a bit of self affirmations. When I feel like this, I laugh at the memory of Stewart Smalley....because, you know what?
I'm good enough.
I'm smart enough....
And doggone it, people LIKE ME.

I'm good enough.
I'm smart enough....
And doggone it, people LIKE ME.

I'm good enough.
I'm smart enough....
And doggone it, people LIKE ME.

I'm good enough.
I'm smart enough....
And doggone it, people LIKE ME.

The End.

Five Ways....

To make my afternoon feel less daunting.

I've said it before, and I'll say it again. I love my job. I love the company I work for and I love the work my company does. As much as I love my job, I've hit a work-day pattern that I NEED to shake. My mornings always FLY by...and my afternoons DRAG.

To help rectify this, I've come up with a list of five things to make my afternoons less of a pain in my rear.

1) Get up and walk around the office once an hour.
2) Avoid my Google Reader until 1pm...that way I have many things to read!!
3) Make it a point to force myself to work for at least twenty minutes each hour.
4) Apply for online reality television programs.
5) Rally your single friends for a speed dating event.

So folks, there ya have it! Five ways I've made my afternoons a little more tolerable. Hope everyone is having a fantabulous week!